Sometimes I feel like such a weird-o. And it happened tonight. But let me start at the very beginning....
After I came home with baby Grey and a few weeks had passed I wondered why my "uterus" wasn't shrinking... hum. (Okay, this is going to get tad graphic and pretty gross--you were warned!) Everything else was shrinking down in its usual fashion but my "uterus." In fact it was beginning to look more and more like a softball just sitting right there on my incision line. As I was showing my Dr. at my 5 week visit the look on his face told me I was way off on my diagnosis...yeah, that would be an incisional (I think that's what it's called) hernia. Meaning when I lay down my intestines go back where they are supposed to go and when I stand up they try to sneak out. And they succeed. This isn't some "weakening of the abdominal lining" or any of that regular pregnancy stuff...this is full on insides coming out because what is supposed to be holding them in has been cut too many times that it wouldn't stay together. (And fixing it is a whole other issue because I'm not quite sure I'm finished with my family and blah blah blah....)
So now the story. I have to wear this abdominal binder to hold it in. Fine. Great. I'm glad they make them. But, when it's on it only raises my body temperature about 20 degrees and adds about 1/2 inch thickness where it is. Which is basically my whole torso and not what you want when you're only 8 weeks postpartum....more inches around the waist, no thank you!
So I go to this craft party/show tonight and I can't keep my mouth shut about it. Any time anyone commented on how I looked I didn't just say "thanks" (and they only commented because it is seriously a drastic difference from my humongous pregnant belly--anything would be...I was that big!) I start going on about how I'm wearing this binder and why and how it's SO thick and blah blah blah!!!I've got to get a grip! So that was good to go out and realize I can't be doing that for the next year. Do you ever do stuff like that? When you almost just have to laugh because look back and try to figure out who that girl was who kept talking about her hernia??? And why was she talking about it? Did she all of the sudden look thinner because they knew she was wearing a thick brace? Ha! Welcome to my world. Oh well...no worries...no more gross hernia talk I promise!
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12 comments:
I always remember the girl that talked about her twin that was growing on her arm.... some weird thing about teeth and bones and such. The hernia thing would be pretty odd too. I have a neighbor with a hernia ball on her belly, but she's only 3 :) I know you wanted to hear that. So hopefully this envelope thing will help and maybe you can get me one for my "One year after" look. I could still use one! Later Suzy!
Suzy - I love you for being so real! I think we've all probably been in situations similar to this! Maybe not exactly like it - I usually don't have a valid excuse for added "thickness"! But we all worry so much about those things and it's so hard not to let them slide into conversation!! I think your reflection on the situation is admirable.
But really, it all boils down to this: what a lame situation to be in!!! Ever since Wes and I heard about the hernia complication we've been thinking about you so much and you've been so often in our prayers! We've wanted to call but haven't. Bah. Someday I"ll be better at that!
Anyway, we love you and WISH we could be at Grey's blessing!! We're so anxious to see him and hope it will be soon - before he's TOO big!!
Hah, you wouldn't believe how many conversations I turned awkward by saying too much about my brain situation i.e. "You look so good Wes! Yeah but I still can't think straight..." (cue akward silence until the next convenient topic change). All I can do is laugh about it now. Anyway, we are praying for you everday Sis. Love you.
If I were at the party, I would have been totally fascinated to hear about the hernia and treatment, etc. There are so many complications to childbirth that you never even hear about (and I am really sorry that you have had more than your fair share of them). So does it feel like you are wearing a corset? I really hope it helps and you are better soon.
Oh Suzy... you and I have so much to talk about!!! I can't even tell you how many times I leave a social situation and wonder if I should sew my mouth up the next time I am let out of the house!!! No, people don't mind hearing about your post baby body woes... we all have them! It makes it more fun to sit around and see that we are not the only ones who have sacrificed our body to have our precious children!!! You're awesome!
So after our phone conversation today I felt the same way....blah blah blah about my issues! :) Thanks for listening Suz, you're such a great sister!
I am so sad that you have this trial, and it is good therapy to talk and even write about it. You did look beautiful last night and no one would ever know you were pregnant just weeks ago!
Suzy, sorry to hear about your hernia.:( Glad to hear you are normal in your response to it. We love you and you always look perfect to me.
Oh Suz....so sorry..what a bummer!! I loved you post however, because that is SO ME!!! I'm the worst, Phoebe is so good and just keeps her mouth shut with everything and me...NO....I just let it all out and then think why did I just say all of that....It so remminded me of ME and what I would say....Dang it...sorry you have to go through that....Grey is getting so big....darling pictures!!
I always seem to do this, too, where I give way more information than is needed because I feel self conscious about something and feel the need to explain it to any poor soul who's happened to ask. I'm glad I'm not the only one, and I hope you can get the hernia problem resolved soon! That would be a little annoying, I'm sure!
Well if it makes you feel better i have two huge skin tags right inside my nostril and you know how my nostrils probably already draw attention. Well they look like two giant boogers and i have to warn anyone who talks to me that they are just skin tags.(all my hormones!) Everyone says they wouldn't have noticed it, but they are lying. I am still all about the explaining and bringing it up. I am too prideful to just let something that i have never ending boogs hanging inside my nose! My dad and jason are BEGGING me to get it taken off. See they are being honest! Continue explaining yourself if it makes you feel better!
okay, can i just say that that is totally me!!! i herniated my umbilical when i carried my twins and shortly after the dr. told me about it, i blabbed it all over at a girl's get together. i felt so silly about it afterwards, but can i tell you i'm so excited to get rid of it after i have all my kiddies! nice to know there are others in the world....
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